Tag Archives: thinking

Project You  This is probably the most difficult life lesson to learn but the most necessary. The pressures and stresses of life this summer have allowed me the opportunity to look myself in the eyes. This summer I’ve questioned so many things and have also made some life changing decisions. I’ve reminisced about my past and agonized over some of my hurts and at the same time proudly celebrated my greatest triumphs thus far. I’ve fought with my inner self to the point of exhaustion and then just felt like completely walking away from the whole project of me.

It is so easy to lose myself in the world’s definition of success, beauty, & happiness. It’s easy to start striving for standards that are not my own just to feel accepted, loved, validated….to feel like I belong somewhere. As I chat with ladies of all ages I’m discovering the struggle is the same and no matter the season of life, fighting for your self-worth is a lifestyle. It starts with loving yourself first and treating yourself the way that you want to be treated, knowing that your value doesn’t change because of someone’s inability to see your worth.

I’m a person that just wants to love everyone but sometimes I do it at the expense of myself all in the name of helping and loving someone. I’ve taken the long road to learn that lesson in my past and know now that loving and giving to my breaking point is not love. It doesn’t help anyone for me to destroy myself in the process.

Remember that taking care of yourself enables you to be a better provider to those around you.

It’s not healthy and I’ve learned that a healthy life is a happy one. That is easier said than done especially when it comes to relationships, because relationships are just plain messy. We’re human and it takes a lot of patience, grace, and maturity to navigate through the ups and downs of miscommunication, hurt feelings, and all the randomness that can spark a conflict. A part of taking care of yourself means to have the courage to be honest with yourself about the relationships that are draining your life instead of being life giving. In the long run by deciding to cut ties in those relationships will be the best decisions that you’ve ever made for yourself. You deserve to be happy and healthy and setting boundaries to take care of you is always the right decision.

It doesn’t matter where you’ve been or where you are now, all that matters that you have the power to choose to start loving and taking care of yourself today. This moment, this life is yours and you can change. Don’t be so hard on yourself. I always have to remind myself that imperfect progress is still progress. I still make mistakes and still fall victim to my insecurities some days but none of those things change that fact that I’m worth the fight. Taking care of myself has made me a stronger woman and given me the opportunity to give and love others in ways that I never thought possible. So it’s ok, take some time for yourself. Do something that you love, take a quiet walk, read a book, take a nap, wander around an art museum…celebrate you! You’ll be better for it. You’re uniquely you and that’s always worth celebrating! Have fun and enjoy!

God Bless,

Shine

 

Project: Me

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A High Point

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“Mountaintops inspire leaders. Valleys mature them.”

-Winston Churchill

There is a place where I feel in complete peace. The view is overwhelmingly breathtaking. Every time. It’s a place where I can be completely honest with myself about the seasons that I am in. I can go there broken, angry, when I’m on cloud nine, or just because I had the time. I am always accepted and there is no judgement. There is always a feeling of coming home, a relief to be in a place that I am completely known. The worries, the busy days, all the weights of my world just melt away in this place. I get just what I need at every visit, comfort, rest, quiet, encouragement, a reality check… just a simple stillness that meets me exactly where I am at in the moments that I find myself there.

My alarm goes off at sunrise and I debate going back to sleep but then I remember the little adventure that lies ahead of me and I get out of bed. My backpack is already packed and in the quiet morning I wash my face and brush my teeth and quickly slip on my shoes and out the door. Even though my body is screaming for more sleep there is an excitement inside of me that fuels my determination to make it to my destination.

After I park and double check my backpack for water and my small breakfast I take my first step on the dusty trail that is my very own yellow brick road. My legs begin to warm with every step, as the elevation slowly increases the sleepiness fades away, my breathe quickens and my body begins to feel alive and energized. On the way up there are a few climbs that make my muscles burn and tempt me to stop pushing upward. I don’t want to take any breaks for fear of losing any momentum that’ll shorten my travel time. I’m anxious to be home and enjoy the air and be in awe of the beauty that I know awaits me.

I always sit for a minute at the one mile mark. The engraved stone that read “1 mile” is gone but the mold of its resting place is still there serving as my own personal checkpoint. I have one final climb to push through, and then I’ll be there. With my headphones on I watch the world pass by, I slowly sip my water, while inhaling deeply and exhaling with precise control, my heart is pounding. I give a polite nod to each passerby and sometimes a slight smile, they say with their eyes, “You’re almost there.” I sit just long enough to recover my breathe, then quickly get back on my dusty feet, recommit myself to this climb with a quiet determination to finish strong no matter how I feel. I am my own coach. “You’re stronger than you think you are. Come on. Press in.”

I’m suddenly aware of every step and the size of every boulder on my way up. I’m carefully calculating my path on the way up doing my best to conserve what’s left of my energy so I don’t have to stop again. I’m so close I’m just ready to get there. My deep concentration to keep my momentum gets interrupted as people who’ve already quenched the beauty slowly trickle down the narrow path I’m struggling to stay on. They politely step aside or quickly pass probably relating to me, because it’s where they were moments earlier.

The best part is the last twenty feet before the top, because I’m completely depleted, challenging all my limits but there is always a burst of energy that meets me and I charge forward, raising my gaze to my horizon. There’s a shining silhouette of relieved hikers enjoying the reward of their hard work and I step over the top, and the sky just opens up and a refreshing relief just washes over my body and my mind is free of everything. I am home. There is a calm that settles over me and a thankful smile spreads across my face as I take in a panoramic gaze of my little piece of heaven. I am reminded of how truly blessed I am. I sit off in my own little corner so that I can bask in the pure joy of this place.

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You’re free to THINK as you please.

It’s amazing how adaptable we are as humans. If we open our minds to the possibilities and opportunities then really anything is possible. But when we focus on the limitations or possible failures, the “what ifs”, or “last times” we seriously rob ourselves of experiencing the amazing moments or people that could have changed our lives. I had this epiphany while I was at my dance lesson for Zouk tonight. I’ve been doing West Coast Swing for the past year and a half and I love it. But tonight the characteristics of West Coast Swing were holding me back from being a free flowing Zouk dancer. Zouk is even more free flowing and organic than West Coast Swing. The moves are limitless but only if I was open to them. At first I was struggling, trying to keep beat and remember where my feet where supposed to be but it was because I was applying all the rules of West Coast Swing to Zouk. It just wasn’t working, it was actually pretty funny to watch. When I stopped thinking of what was familiar to me (let go of my West Coast Swing mindset) I was able to dance more fluidly. I became open to the Zouk movements and it all started to make sense and I finally felt like I was dancing! So exciting!! In life we do this to ourselves, limit the awesomeness that could be had because of fear, insecurity, or just being too comfortable in what we find familiar. We were meant to thrive daily but our mind sets limit us because we allow it.

Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t – you’re right. -Henry Ford

It matters what you think on. It affects your day today, tomorrow, and in the grand scheme of things, it can affect the trajectory of your entire future. It’s that deep. Makes me think twice about my attitude day to day. If I can make tremendous progress in an hour dance lesson, how much more growth could I achieve if I applied that principle to my life. Yes I agree easier said than done because life in general is one hot mess sometimes. But there is hope that change is possible for everyone.

You’re free to think as you please but what ARE you thinking about?

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